You know what the best thing about the midwest is? Its the only place in America where you can still get transfats. And let's be honest, transfats taste soooo much better than regular old fats. I just returned from a loverly little trip to the midwest and i had forgotten that everything comes fried with a side a fries. (And you can't buy booze on Sundays neither, damn Puritanical heritage). I consumed: 1 BLT with a side of fries 2. 1 gyro with a side of fries 3. sushi a la midwest (california rolls) with a side of fries 4. 16 cans of PBR which tastes delicious and so much better in cans. 5. 4 margaritas that may or may not have had any actual tecquila in it- (I should have pulled an EJ and asked for the tecquila on the side) 5. Italian meat pizza with a side of fried calamari. 6. two cups of Blue Moon ale, which i am not really a fan of, but between that and Bud Light, when both cost $1.50, I'm going for the "classier" Blue Moon. (These were consumed at the racetrack where i proceeded to win 15 dollars hitting the exacta box in the 5th race on Mr. Mink and Guccione (how could you not bet on a horse named after the publisher of Hustler????))
Which brings me to the point: the midwest is SO cheap its criminal. I think I paid 7 dollars for 30 cans of PBR. Therefore, here is my Recipe for Good Times in the Midwest:
1. 30 cans of PBR
2. Outdoor sporting event
3. Several fried items accompanied by a side of fries
Drink the PBR in the sun while savoring the awesome transfats in your favorite fried food item. yum.
2 comments:
um, you are hilarious. that was way too funny. j and i got PBR in a can in nashville - in a bar. we were so excited to get canned beer in a bar!!!
There used to be a bar in SD called Landlord Jim's where you could get PBR in a can and they serve it to you in a brown paper bag. How awesome is that?!? Alas, LJ's has closed to make way for the expansion of the nearby community college.
Post a Comment